Making a New Year’s resolution is like pouring alcohol over an open cut. You don’t want to do it, but you know you should. The problem is that determination usually gives way to apathy and lost goals. Plenty of articles have been written detailing how many Americans don’t stick to their New Year’s resolutions and require years of therapy on a head shrink’s couch to recover lost self-esteem (okay, I’m exaggerating). In case you find yourself struggling to determine what to improve and how to accomplish those goals, I’m here to offer suggestions. After all, nobody is perfect.
1. Live the healthy way. Millions of Americans declare they’re going to lose weight each year. Millions of Americans spend money on gym memberships and diet remedies. Millions of Americans weigh more each Christmas than they did on the previous Valentine’s Day. This is because they focus on short-term diets instead of healthy lifestyles. If you need to lose a spare tire, develop a weight-loss plan that includes eating properly, exercising, and enjoying the world around you. This may come as a surprise to someone raised down here in the Deep South, but there’s more to life than food. Raising potato chips to your mouth and pressing remote control buttons do not count as exercise. If you join a gym, take advantage of your membership and use the resources offered to you. Just do everybody else a favor and wear a robe in the locker room if you are morbidly obese.
2. Drive like you want to see tomorrow. I lost count of how many crazy drivers almost hit my friends and me during Christmas traffic last year. I watched insane motorists make U-turns in the middle of rush traffic, speed through stop signs and red lights, tail each other within twelve inches of the cars’ bumpers, and commit other driving crimes for which their vehicles should have been impounded and melted into mood rings. If you think I’m describing you, don’t ignore me; drive like you actually want to live. Furthermore, if you’re a bleached-blonde who talks on your cell phone and ignores traffic while barreling down roads in a gas-guzzling SUV, congratulations—you’re a stereotype.
3. Make sure the people you love know it. You don’t need to gush poetry or embarrass yourself to tell your family and friends you love them. Just tell them, and show them with your actions. I hate watching a man make a joke out of telling his kids they’re loved; what, is the guy not secure enough to tell them unashamedly?
4. Accomplish something you always wanted to do. Whether it’s painting happy trees with a Bob Ross video or belly dancing like an Arabian snake, step outside your self-made box and enjoy the world you forgot exists outside your everyday duties. One of the best movie quotes comes from “Auntie Mame”: “Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death.” Don’t be the next poster child for malnourishment.
5. Broaden a narrow worldview. If you’re the sort of person who takes as much as you can and expects everyone around you to do things your way, get off your lazy butt and volunteer time with local organizations. Opportunities range from helping homeless people to mentoring troubled teenagers, from planting gardens to restoring neighborhoods. Don’t go into these places thinking you are going to be in charge; instead, be quiet and look for ways you can help others. Stop thinking about yourself and take an active role in helping the community around you.
Of course, other resolutions may be more important to you, like quitting smoking, being more environmentally friendly, or going to church more often. Whatever you choose to do this year, shut off your excuses and make up your mind to accomplish your goals. Then you can reward yourself with a sports highlights-worthy celebration like drinking milk, dumping an ice chest on yourself, or taking off your shirt and running through a soccer field.
First Published in PoV.
